For my birthday this year, I took a once-in-a-lifetime trip to Ireland. I had the very best travel companion, my cousin Keri. Fun fact, she is both my first and second cousin. (Her mom and my mom were sisters; her dad and my dad were cousins.) She had been to Ireland before, so I asked her to come along on my adventure, and she graciously accepted!

We had an amazing trip, exploring Galway, where our ancestors came from, and Dublin. The people and sights were incredible. Every little shop had souvenirs and jewelry with clovers and the claddaugh. I have always loved the claddaugh. If you don’t know what that is, it’s this:

The lore of the claddaugh states that you cannot buy one for yourself. It must be a gift. I have received a few claddaugh over the years. One was from my first husband. I gave that one to our daughter. One was my wedding ring from my second marriage. I have yet to figure out what to do with that one. I have always wanted one with my birthstone.

While in a jewlery shop looking for gifts for our families, I leaned over to Keri and said, “If I give you money, will you buy me a claddaugh?” We both laughed and then she said, “No! I will get you one. I wanted to get you a birthday gift!” I was so surprised. She had already made the trip all about me. I excitedly tried on rings with my birthstone: sapphire. Initially, there was not one that fit me. The sales girl kindly offered to check their back stock. After a few minutes, SUCCESS!! Here is the ring on my hand that very day:

While we were in Ireland, I was dating someone. It was a pretty wild situation. We met and both quickly fell in love. So when I got the ring, I put it on with the heart facing in.

Sadly, that relationship ended abruptly a few weeks after the trip. It was heart breaking at the moment that left me reeling. My best friends, Donna and Arne, wanting to support me in my sadness, came in to town just to take me to dinner and be there for me. He had ended things on Wednesday. The dinner was Saturday. We were sitting at the restaurant, eating and talking, when Arne took my hand. He gently pulled the claddaugh off of my finger, turned it around and put it back on. A small detail and loving gesture. I had mindlessly continued to put it on as if I was taken.

It takes someone who really knows and sees me to make such a powerful gesture. He wasn’t just correcting the direction of the ring. He was saying, “I see you.” For a very long time, the only person who saw me was my mom. She saw me for me and loved me exactly as I am. I have missed that dearly.

Do you see the people you love? I mean, truly see them? Do you note small details and validate what they need? Do you allow them to be completely themselves? Are you a soft place for them to land when they need to fall apart?

I still love my claddaugh and Keri for buying it. It is one of my most cherished reminders of that trip. The second is my tattoo. That’s for another post. I am so blessed to have people who see me. I hope you do too.