Have you ever heard that saying? I have heard it in many different contexts. The most recent was during my leadership training in regards to how to speak to those I supervising.

Today, while teaching, a couple of the young men got side-tracked in a discussion of what behaviors they considered to be ‘gay’ from a man. I attempted to re-direct them back to the lesson (what the heck does that have to do with math????). In spite of my attempts, they continued until it reached the point where they were speaking in words that are never acceptable in a classroom. I stopped it, reminded them that they were entitled to their opinion, but that they were not allowed to speak that way in class. Any further use of defamatory terms would result in being kicked out of class for the day.

Now, keep in mind that the youth I work with are used to dropping ‘F-bombs’ and the N-word in casual conversation. To them, the N-word is a term of endearment! We had a long discussion about why that is not okay. Throughout the day, I am on them constantly. No, really. I swear I am reminding them with every other sentence that their language is not appropriate. That being said, the conversation that I had ended earlier was the first time I had ever heard from them what I would consider ‘hate speech.’

I have to return to my previous blog on the lack of kindnesses in their lives. Why would they dare be kind to homosexuals? To them, they are simply ‘others’ and not worthy of anything but ridicule and judgments.

How do I affect change with these youth? After class was over, I thought of the saying above. I can assure you that most of the students I work with would not agree that these questions are important. However, I will be sharing this with them tomorrow.

It’s all about values and priorities.

I value kindness. They value being right.

I value compassion. They value entertainment and humor.

I value people. They value things.

It makes me sad, and yet I will continue to hope. I will speak with kindness. I will speak with truth. And I will say the things that are necessary, even if they are really hard to say.

Pray that I am able to get through to at least one young person.

If one young person can see what I am saying and see any value in my words, then that is a tiny ripple that will spread. It may not spread quickly, but I believe it will spread.

I have to believe. I have to hope. It’s kinda why I am here.