ok, so i know i have been in love before. but this time really is different, and i want to try to explain why. in my past, i have fallen for the guy who showed me attention and treated me (relatively) well, whether he deserved my affections or not. more often than not, i pursued him, like a puppy, always ready, willing and able to be at his beck and call. yeah, pathetic. i know.

that last rat-bastard made me realize what a fool i have been when it comes to relationships. i am a damn fine person, great personality and all that jazz. i’d be a super catch for the man who deserves me. yeah, i guess you could say i had gotten almost cocky in my worthyness after the last douchebag tried so hard to make me miserable. so i had pretty much decided to give up on dating and just love my life.

so how on earth do i find myself in love again? lemme tell you… yes, i did find mike online. i answered his ad. i was really being a smartass about it, too. he had posted that he was somewhat of a ‘good catch.’ i, in turn, replied, “what makes you such a good catch?” i guess he liked that i was not about to be fooled, because the conversation began and has not yet ended.

we met over dessert at eat n park. i remember doing a lot of the talking (yeah, i know…no shock there) and smiling A LOT because i felt so damn comfortable. after taking up that table for a few hours (i know the waitress hated us) we went for a walk on the trail behind the shops. mike held my hand and it felt so right.

after we walked for a while, mike stopped us. he took my face in his hands and said, “I already know you are worth any wait. I want to prove to you that you can trust me, and I will do whatever it takes to make it happen.” then he kissed me.

i SO wanted to believe him. i wanted to trust that he was a good guy, not another jerk… but i told him flat-out that i was afraid to trust him. mike was completely unfazed…he said he was willing to prove it.

fast forward two months…yes, it has been more than two months since that first date. guess what? he has proven it. he is 100% who he says he is. he makes me laugh daily. he talks and he listens. he loves my girls and they are figuring out that he is worthy of their love in return.

this all happened right at the moment when i had decided it was ok if it never happened. how about that for timing?

so, yes… i am in love again. i feel really good that this just might be the love i always sought… and that i won’t have to look again.